As we approach the end of the year, it’s time for me to catalog all of my accomplishments during 2025. Being my first full year of retirement, it was filled with thrills of all kinds.
I already mentioned becoming a grandfather, but I have to confess that I had approximately zero to do with that. As such, I like taking credit where none is due – kind of like a politician.
But there’s a lot more that I got done this year.
For example, I started another book, which will soon join my two other books on the New York Times Least Seller List. I have come to terms with the fact that people don’t want to read books about farming in Minnesota and post-war Alaska. I also assume they won’t want to read about drug-running commercial fishermen either. I suppose it’s their loss.
Then there was the marathon I didn’t run. Actually, I watched one of our sons run it. Look, I’m old and have a bad heart, so running 26 miles at a clip isn’t going to happen. But I did show up at the end to watch the runners finish their race. Many looked like they were finishing a Sunday morning jog, but most were a little wobbly and just followed my old philosophy of “complete, not compete.”
Also on my list of accomplishments was starting an online store selling autographed photos of TV and movie stars. I am constantly amazed at what folks will buy. For example, an autographed photo of actors from any of the three million Star Trek shows and sequels sells like cold beer on a hot summer day. But photos of other movie and TV stars, not so much. Lauren Bacall, Jimmy Stewart – photos of these stars and others like them rarely generate even a bid.
However, my greatest accomplishment was something that many people thought to be impossible. It involved teaching our cat, code name Heidi, to roll over. I spent many hours coaching, cajoling, pleading and pestering her to get her to roll over, all to no avail.
It’s not that Heidi was unable to roll on her back. She will happily do it whenever she wants. The key was to convince her that she wanted to.
She quickly figured out that when I paid attention to her was her cue to leave the room. This put us at a standoff of sorts. When I wasn’t paying attention, she would roll over. Whenever I looked her way she would run out of the room.
The breakthrough came the other day. I was sitting on the stairs putting my shoes on, and Heidi saw that I was distracted. She laid on the rug just as I saw her. I pulled the rug out from under her and hollered “Roll over!” She rolled right off it and ran out of the room.
I’m no expert at training animals. I gave up training service dogs because it became obvious that they were smarter than me and three of our kids.
But in this case, I’m going to take the win and add it to my annual list of accomplishments. As for next year, the only thing I know is 2025 will be hard to top.
Carl Sampson is a retired writer and editor. He lives in Stayton.
